Deborah Deveau, Toronto
For most of my life, I have always wanted to know what I should be doing with my life, how am I going to be happy. Hoping to find answers to these questions, I signed up to join Bodhi Meditation’s 8.5-Day Health and Happiness Retreat held in October, 2018.
Not only were these questions answered for me very clearly during the retreat, I also went through life transformative changes.
On a personal level, because I wanted so badly to “be cool and fit in”, I started smoking and drinking when I was 12 years old. As an Irishwoman, I can tolerate high alcohol levels. The more I drank, the more I smoked. Thus, for the past 48 years, cigarettes and alcohol were part of my daily life.
I was also in a very dysfunctional relationship with my husband. For 18 years, we were like oil and water. He knew what buttons to push, making me very angry to the point that I’d want to hurt him. When our fights got really loud, my neighbors called the cops – not once or twice, but numerous times.
At one point, I took a screen cover – one that you use to cover an open frying pan to keep grease from splattering – and I hit him right on the top of his lip and I split it. When I saw the blood, I came to my senses, and I said, “God help me!” I would say to God at night, “ You know what, God? I’m done and I’m tired. Just take me now. I don’t want my life to be like this.” It was so horrible.
That was my life prior to joining the 8.5-Day Health and Happiness Retreat.
When I found out that I couldn’t smoke nor drink during the 8.5-Day Health and Happiness Retreat, I got worried. I decided to take it one day at a time. I knew that if I did not have that first cigarette in the morning, I would be able to go all day without cigarettes. I had to really stay away from alcohol, because I cannot drink without smoking as well. It was “do or die”.
Thanks to everything I learned during the retreat, I am really happy and grateful to share that I abstained from cigarettes and alcohol throughout the 8.5 days of the retreat and then some. It is now March, 2019, and other than for one setback, I am still smoke- and alcohol-free.
The other major transformation is my relationship with my husband, Tony. During the retreat, I was able to reflect on our relationship and I realized that I had not been entirely innocent. For the first time in a very, very long time, I was able to sincerely tell Tony that I love him, how much I truly appreciate him as a person and as my partner. Now that I see him in a totally different light, I realize how much I owe Tony. I dread to think what I would do without him. And Tony felt this and this is what led to his transformation too. Nowadays, Tony is very calm, very gentle. He does everything for me. He asks, “What can I cook for you?” He’s just spoiling me in every way.
While we still fight once in a while as normal couples do, the situation has improved 500% – the neighbors don’t hear us anymore and the cops don’t come to visit us!
With the 8.5- Day Health and Happiness Retreat, not only did I get my life questions answered, my life also transformed in ways I could never imagine!
Note: The effects of meditation may vary by individual.